Mommy Got Back!

I like bad commercials and I cannot lie Those other mothers can deny But when the King walks in with his shiny plastic face, faux outrage time will waste! I get the giggles ‘til I start to cry, Though the haters may start to sigh When those ladies start to spin, it really makes me [...]

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Today’s Forecast: Boring With A Chance Of Fun

Today Oprah.com posted our answers to some of the viewer questions sent in after The Secret Lives of Moms show (search keyword: Heija). It was a privilege to hear stories from moms around the country. I love hearing and sharing the silly and sage advice that we pass from mom to mom. But lately I [...]

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Good Morning Mrs. Twitter!

Today Oprah learned to Twitter. I joined Twitter two weeks ago and allow me to say, whew! Thank goodness my mean friends won’t be able to say something along the lines of “do you do EVERYTHING Oprah tells you to do?” (For the record the answer is yes, for the most part) I have tweeted [...]

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It’s Okay To Look?

“It’s okay to look?” Really? So I keep hearing these commercials for a certain online dating service. Yes, it’s true. I watch channels that target the young, single, birth control purchasing, itchy vagina, herpes demographic. I can’t help it. I am mesmerized by “The Real Housewives” (east coast only, please), and pretty much anything else [...]

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Do Your Eyes Light Up?

Oprah nodded in grave agreement as Toni Morrison said a true test of maternal love is whether ‘your eyes light up’ each time your child enters the room. I was so stunned I nearly spit my bon-bons. Every time, seriously? I am the Worst Mother in the World because there are times when my children [...]

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The Broken Penis Talk

This week on the show Dr. Laura Berman tells us how to talk to our kids about sex. It’s too late for my oldest son, let’s just call him Sweetie Boy. Everything he needed to know about sex he learned from Oprah, Dr. Oz and a knowledgable local expert; his ten year old friend. Two [...]

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Don’t Hate Me Because I Am Ovulating

I watch Oprah in spurts and starts, maybe a few minutes in the 4pm hour and then the rest at 9pm because in my market it runs twice a day-yeah King-Kong! I love the days that I can watch the show straight through with a cup of tea in hand, but that rarely happens. My [...]

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